I know I've shared before that Madelyn is a butterfly in my eyes. She's beautiful inside and out, she's sweet, sensitive and delicate. Her 5th birthday fell on Nov 1st. Two days after moving into a new house and just a few weeks after switching elementary schools. I can't quite put into words how impressed I am with her and her resiliency through all of this. Everyone said "she'll be fine" "harder on us than her" "kids are resilient." Which I appreciated and do believe is partially true, but sometimes those saying it didn't really know our Miss M. Everything that is something, is even bigger to her. She loves big, fears big, cries big and feels with such intense emotion sometimes she just gets so overwhelmed. So we really went back and forth with concerns if she could handle all of this at once.
Add to that, the fact that we know a lot of teachers - family and friends. I have an aunt and uncle who both adamantly advised us not to send Madelyn to Kindergarten. After that, one of their kids (my 20 year old cousin) who was young for his grade, chimed in on how much he hated be young and how hard it was for him. Others would sort of say with surprise - "oh you are sending her to K?" So without them saying so much, I knew what they thought. We were very conflicted and with Madelyn's personality, really weren't sure it was a good idea (literally up until the weeks leading up to registration!). We finally decided that we'd ask her preschool teachers for their honest opinion. Ultimately, that's what sealed the deal for us. Without hesitation they said she was definitely ready. Madelyn had been at this preschool for 2 full years, so they knew her well and that was enough for us. That, and I'd be lying if I said her size didn't matter at all in the decision. She's been in the 95th percentile since birth, and at her most recent check up, still is. So, I was a little worried about holding her back and having an already tall girl, tower over other kids in her class.
So, off we went. At the beginning of the school year a handful of new friends had 6th birthday parties. It was a frequent topic of conversation that she was younger than everyone, and she was turning "only" 5. After more weeks went by and she settled into her new school, new house, new routine, I think she grew more and more confident that she could spell, write and understand just like her friends. She was keeping up (in some cases excelling :) and suddenly age didn't matter at all.
Even into the new year it was like we could see her growing before our eyes, both physically and mentally. Her sleep was disrupted, and there were behavioral challenges at home but her mid-year conference at school was just glowing. Just like when an infant has a growth spurt - they may be more cranky, have disrupted sleep, and act out of the ordinary. I wish someone had warned me that these kinds of things aren't just with babies. It makes perfect sense but at the time I was exhausted and so overwhelmed with the tantrums and fighting, I didn't know what happened to my sweet girl. Kids are so smart and so much more perceptive than we give them credit for, it's really such an amazing thing.
I feel like in addition to Madelyn's growth, I grew up a lot this year too. Rather than being defeated by behavior that I didn't know what to do with, I began to really tend to Madelyn individually. Unintentionally, I just softened up. Rather than being so hard on the discipline, I gave more hugs, empathized more and encouraged her to talk more. I had been fighting with her so much and it wasn't until I realized that her (negative) behavior was a result of her needing more from me, that it all subsided.
So who knows what next year will bring, and all the years to follow. I know there will be more excitement and more challenges. I'm just thrilled with how far we've come and how well M did this year. For now, we're going to celebrate our little girl who crushed Kindergarten, just like her Mom and Dad thought she would! <3
