4 weeks in photos!

 Not much has changed since my last post, now officially though, I am 35. I'll spare you from any more whining, and share the fun I've captured on my phone over the last month. It's been a great summer, and I'll sure miss all this swimming in the coming months. I got a new phone for my birthday (finally!) So, all phone photos going forward will actually be decent :) Happy Hump Day! XO

Uncle B's Birthday celebration:

The start to my birthday weekend on MV - A Seafood Shanty Mudslide!

The Annual MV Agricultural Fair

 Edgartown Harbor

Champagne and nachos for my bday cocktail hour before dinner in town

On our way to my bday dinner

 Cake!

My current state...

Life is not all rainbows and butterflies, I know that... it just cant be. Then you wouldn't appreciate the little things, and have perspective. In an attempt to always be real, I am sharing my current state. I don't even know what to classify it as, but I am bumming in a major way.

Currently - our house is on the market, we've had over 20 showings, 3 or 4 repeat visits and another 20+ people who have come by on our weekly open houses. So far, no bites and this whole - keep the house clean every day like you don't live there, is FOR THE BIRDS. To think that my parents did this for 18 MONTHS with 3 small kids, is incomprehensible to me. God Bless my mom, because we're 3 weeks in, and I'm so over it. So, pretty sure we aren't moving, and its time to plan our next project for This Old House.

Madelyn starts Kindergarten in 2 weeks, and I'm in complete denial. I have a backpack and her school supplies and sometime soon we'll take her shopping for some new shoes and clothes. We got her bus assignment yesterday and teachers assignments come next week. I'm acting like I am so excited around her, but inside all of the emotions are seriously overwhelming/exhausting me.

Now for the best part... I was SO looking forward to celebrating the big 3-5 on Martha's Vineyard this weekend with family.  I don't have any vacation time left, so the plan was for it to be a long weekend for me and Anna (Thursday through Sunday, but I was going to maybe call out Monday :) and then Brian and M would stay up Wed - Wed. The weather looked great, and this time of year is so nice out there - it was shaping up to be a great long weekend and all I'd want for my birthday.

Rewind to last Thursday night. Anna has been a bear lately at bedtime. Some sort of regression where she cries until we rock her and fights going down, delaying bedtime easily by 1.5 hours. Then every other night or so, she was waking in the middle of the night, needing the same comforting sometimes for 3 HOURS. So, we've been tired :) FINALLY - Thursday night, she went to bed with ease, just like she used to. At 7:45 I grabbed my bag, to run a quick errand in town looking for small potted plants as end of the summer gifts for Madelyn's teacher. I went back and forth a few times on my way out - do I go to Home Depot, or grocery store... ultimately, I picked our small and (very unpopular) grocery in town.

Within minutes of getting inside and grabbing my flowers, I slipped and completely wiped out, falling into a wall. I was crippled, and paralyzed on my left side, and thought I broke my hip because I fell into a split (which I haven't attempted in 15 years!). Until I reached up my left arm and could feel my shoulder near my elbow. I knew right away it was dislocated. The manager was no where to be found, and some random (rockstar) young girl walked in right behind me and took over. She stayed with me, directed people to the side door, called 911 and explained everything. I texted Brian, and my mom came to our house, so that he could meet me at the hospital. They got me in the ambulance (my first time) and one of the EMT's was training and I swear it was his first day. He couldn't figure out how to take my blood pressure, and then dropped an ice pack on my bad shoulder.... no, I'm not making it up. The pain by the time I had gotten to the ER, and the shock had worn off a little was comparable to contractions. It was brutal, not to mention, I couldn't move my left side which was freaky in itself.

X-rays determined it was dislocated and they gave me some wonder drug so that they could pop it back in place. We were there about 2 hours total. I left with a sling, which I need to wear for 3 weeks and a script for percocet, and a note for 2+ days off of work. Maybe I should have filled the script just to have it for fun :)

So, here we are... 3-5 is just 3 days away and our plans have been turned upside down. I can't drive alone and can't bring Anna back with me. So Brian changed his plans and we're all going up together tomorrow, and I'll come home solo on Sunday. I'll be without Bri and the girls for 4 full days - ahhhh. At first I suppose it sounds like a vacation in itself, but when you are down and out, all you want is to be with your faves. So much for my cute outfit I was going to wear out on Saturday, I can barely get dressed as it is. I might just live in my beach cover up while we're there. I cant sleep, can barely shower, can't do my hair, can't hold my kids, or give them baths. I hate not being able to do things around the house, and being taken care of. Not to mention we've had more showings and two more open houses to prep for this weekend. Ugh, just ugh. It could be worse, a lot worse, so for that I am grateful. My mom told me, I need to just deal... and she's right. But I'm not quite there yet. Maybe this "vacation" will help me let go a little. So far, it looks like 3-5 might be off to an interesting start!

Good vibes to you and yours - Happy Hump Day! XO

Our house is on the market!

It's no secret I love houses. I've talked about hour current house many of times on the blog - most notably- here  here and first, here. It's a beautiful charming home, and we have had some amazing memories in it. It goes without saying there have been a few challenges with the house, which is where "This Old House" came from, but it's really been so good to us. Very recently, we decided to take a (crazy) chance, and put it on the market. Mostly because, we recognize that we will probably outgrow it, and we may not be up for doing more work on it. It's been a busy summer so far, and why not add a little more chaos to it ;) We wont keep it on the market for long, just because the start of Kindergarten is quickly approaching and we don't want to add any stress for any of us, at the end of next month.

Maybe there is a family out there looking for a home just like ours, and maybe not. But before we made any further updates or future plans for this home, we thought we'd give this a try. It went live this morning, and I've been staring at my phone, anxious for a request for a showing soon. Patience, is not my strong suit. But honestly, from our past experience, the first week is very telling. We agree though, that if nothing else, it gave us a little confidence boost that we did some great work to it, and she sure does look pretty.

See :)

Happy Monday! XO

I see you, 35

One month from today, I will turn 35.  Yikes.... just yikes.  I can't articulate the feelings that I have about this mini-milestone birthday. Lets just say, the day approaching has stirred all sorts of emotions up in me. Looking ahead and trying to mentally prepare myself to be 3-5, here are some of the things I am feeling:

* Proud - I cant remember daydreaming as a kid or young adult, about finding prince charming, or an elaborate wedding of my dreams, or the house with a white picket fence and kiddos running around. Not to say I didn't think about these things, and wish for them - because I did. I just don't think ahead like that, probably because I'm too consumed with the every day stuff. That said, when I think about where I am at 3-5, my heart could burst with pride. I feel like I am more self-aware now than every before. I have a better understanding of me - I am no longer afraid to say no, I know when to bend, and when to stand strong. I am proud of my accomplishments, my marriage, my family. I feel like I struck the jackpot, and I'm so proud of the family and friends that are near and dear to me. Everything in life takes work, and just like watering a garden (which I don't do, because Brian has the green thumb!) when you take the time to work at it, the reward is great.

* Happy - Don't worry, be happy. Well, I'm not sure what it would take for me not to worry, but nonetheless, I am happy. I know what I like, and don't like, and I try to remember each day, to do what makes me happy. It's important to me to be at my best, for my family and for me, so being happy is key, for everyone!

* Determined - The biggest (and most positive) change in my life since having kids, is my determination. My intentions are clear, and my determination like no other - because everything I do, I do for my kids. I may have given up some of me, and I'm more selfless now, but that is 100% for the better. Watch out - don't mess with this Mama Bear ;)

* Passionate - Pretty sure, 5 or 10 years ago, passionate would not have been a word I would have used to describe myself. After a few job/life changes, and self reflection, I've learned I am passionate. There are a lot of things I feel strongly about - and I can't hide it.

* Anxious - Pretty sure that me, and Mr. Anxiety, will be friends for my lifetime. Makes me sound crazy, but its certainly not bad. Being a mom, has only increased the amount of things in life to worry and be anxious about. However, I have such contentment about where we are, and what we're doing, that my anxiety is low. I worry about aging and being in good health, but I have been taking better care of myself recently, and seeing such positive results. Pretty sure if I can keep this up, it'll be great.

* Finding balance - Finding a balance pretty much = joy, to me. Because I think when you find it, everything else falls into place, and you are able to appreciate everything and find joy in it all. All that has happened over the last 5 years of my life, has brought me at a place of (much better) balance. Sure there are days that aren't, but I treat those as a lesson and try to improve on the next day.

Life isn't perfect, and God knows, neither am I. But, I am ready 35 - I can't really believe it, but I'll embrace it. To think back, I was pregnant with Madelyn on my 30th birthday, and still in a lot of respects, a kid. So much growing up over the last 5 years, and growth as a person. When I think of my personal changes, it sort of has me excited for the next 5 years and changes to come before the HUGE milestone birthday. Certainly, in no hurry for that one though :) To celebrate this birthday, we are going away for the weekend with friends. Our first time away for 2 nights (without a wedding, etc) just us, fun, and friends. To say I am excited - is an enormous understatement. So much to celebrate, so much to be grateful for. I say, hooooooray for 3-5. I'm ready for ya!

Swoon Series: Accessories

I love accessories, but I don't consider myself very good at accessorizing. Probably because I never end up with more than than 30 minutes to get ready most days, and if I get to blow-dry my hair I'm lucky! That means, accessorizing just doesn't happen. I still appreciate great accessories and the fun that they bring an outfit, and lately I've been trying to make more of an effort to accessorize. It's an easy way to look pulled together, even if you aren't ;) Plus, I rarely wear patterns, I'm definitely more a stripes or solids girl and accessories are the best way to add a little pizzazz.

I've recently purchased these pieces, and I can't wait to wear them all soon. Our calendar is quieting down for a few weeks now... so I might need to plan a date night, or girls night so I have a reason to sport my new pieces!

We have a wedding coming up and I've had my eye on all of these. One is available to rent, which is nice because I'm just not sure I'm cool enough to sport them often :) The others are so reasonable that I might buy them anyway, cool or not cool, because the colors are so pretty!

 Happy Thursday! XO

Oh Sweet Summer

I'm a season girl. I love the change in weather and appreciate the differences each season brings. Before having kids, if you'd asked me, I'd probably have said that Fall was my favorite. The adding layers, covering up in blankets, all things pumpkin and nutmeg, and warm orange and red decorations around the house. However, while Fall is still up there on the list, now, nothing is better that sweet summertime!!

As a kid, both houses I lived in, had a pool. No clue why, but I've never been much into swimming. I think its something about the quick and dramatic change in temperature. So, when I was absolutely desperate to cool off, you could find me sitting on the steps. Sunscreen was sticky, smelly and annoying so I'm embarrassed to say, I used it sparingly, if at all. Add to that, I'm not a big fan of the heat.

A little time, lots of growing up and now 2 kids later... my appreciation for summer has new life. I love getting in the water with the kids, playing in the sand, and I love the smell of sunscreen (and sweat, ha!) that comes off the girls when I give them hugs. It's like everyone has a renewed energy, the kids included during the summer. Something about now having kids, and enjoying the season with them, has totally brought out the kid in me. Playground, beach, pool, you name it, we've been having so much F-U-N! I think one significant plus, is the age of our girls, too. My SIL coined it pretty well recently, when she said we're in the sweet spot. They're more independent, they play together and entertain each other, and they just get such joy out of the simplest things. We can pick up and go on a whim, don't need to lug as much around, and I can actually sit on the beach and sunbathe (umm YAY!). So, not only are we having a great summer so far, but I actually have a little glow to prove I've been able to enjoy being outside :)

I'm always wishing for time to slow down a bit, but I'd be lying if I said I wasn't looking forward to more summer fun on the horizon. Hope you're having a great summer, too! Cheers XO

Happy Hour in the backyard!

The circus came to town, and Mimi came to see it with us :) 

BBQ with friends!

Fathers Day by the pool

 Madelyn has turned into a little fish!

Hanging with Gray at Hayes' birthday party!

Wednesday night concert series at the park in town

Vacation over July 4th in MV - morning story time with Aunt Farrell

 Lighthouse beach - our new favorite spot!